fear less, hope more; eat less, chew more; whine less, breathe more; talk less, say more; love more, and all good things will be yours

So, for once in my life, I think I'm finally getting my shit together. I'm genuinely happy on a regular basis and it honestly... amazes me. I'm too hungover to write an entire post. I've been slacking, I know, but I'll be back. For now, I leave you with this quote: 


"Fear less, hope more; eat less, chew more; whine less, breathe more; talk less, say more; love more, and all good things will be yours." 


Basically, don't be scared, it's not worth it. Be skinny. Stop complaining. Stop talking shit and start speaking the truth. Love. Be happy :)

maturity includes the recognition that no one is going to see anything in us that we don't see in ourselves. stop waiting for a producer. produce yourself.

I will be the first one to admit how immature I am. I think like a 12-year old boy and giggle every time a teacher says orgasm instead of organism in class and tries to play it off like it never happened. I have a terribly dirty mind and I joke about everything. I think it makes a life a little more enjoyable when you can just laugh things off rather than dwelling. But, that really has basically nothing to do with the quote today. Marianne Williamson is a famous lecturer and writer (so she's legit) and she once said: 


"Maturity includes the recognition that no one is going to see anything in us that we don't see in ourselves. Stop waiting for a producer. Produce yourself."


This lady is a smart cookie. Lately I've realized that in order to become anything in life, I have to actually believe in myself. Which is for some reason, very difficult for me. I'm extremely pessimistic. 


What doesn't quite add up for me is that I'm a leader. I've always been a leader. But I guess I'm more of like.. a secondary leader. I like to be given strict direction in order to complete something successfully. I hate being bossed around and I don't really like creating structured work situations but I like being given direction. So, basically I'm a lazy leader. 


I have no idea what I want to do with the rest of my life. I'd like to be successful though... that'd be swell. I'd like to fall in love and all that jazz too. But I really don't know what I'd like my life "production" to be, in this case. I realize I'm only 20, but I just wish I could have some big ol' dream that I've always wanted to fulfill. Eh, maybe next life. 

when angry, count to four. when very angry, swear.

WARNING: Immense amounts of swear words will be used. Stop fucking reading this if you can't deal.

I'm pissed off. Really pissed off. So I keep swearing... or cussing... or cursing, whichever you like to call it. Basically, one of my five roommates decided to break our lease and call it quits for ridiculous reasons and is giving different, vague answers as to why each time we ask. She decided to inform all of us via mass facebook message. Mature, right? That's some serious fuckery right there. So I'm following my boy Mark Twain's advice:

"When angry, count to four. When very angry, swear."


I tried counting to four. Nothing changed. So I went with the swearing method and it seems to be working alright for the moment. I decided to also tell her how I truly felt about the situation in an awfully awkward mass facebook message as well. She was being a hypocrite (which is easily one of my biggest pet peeves) so I had to call her out on it. It's what I do. I can't just stand back. I'm not that person.


I just don't understand this childish behavior. I realize we're only 20 but come on, a mass facebook message? AND she contacted our landlord before informing any of us. Pussy. Move. I can't deal with all that bullshit. So I vented via message and on here. Sorry about that but it's not like anyone but me reads this anyway. Holla at a sista (sista being me, duh!) if you are. Go ahead, leave a comment. Speak yo' mind. Give me some advice because I sure as hell could always use it. I may not respond well to it but hey, I'm sure someday I'll come back to it and go "Hey, that random comment on that blog back in the day is really useful in this situation." And then I'll find you and thank you. Creepy. Sorry. Leaving now!


I will now post a giant picture of my dog as a puppy because it makes me happy. Wilbur's cute. Admire him. 

to feel valued, to know, even if only once in a while, that you can do a job well is an absolutely marvelous feeling

Sometimes all it takes in a little encouragement that you're doing something right to make your day a little better. Baba Wawa (otherwise known as Barbara Walters) said this:


"To feel valued, to know, even if only once in a while, that you can do a job well is an absolutely marvelous feeling." 


As I said before, I can't take a compliment. I'm awful at it; but I'm trying and that's what counts. This weekend was good ol' Halloween. My least favorite holiday of the year. Bad shit always happens to me. Details aren't really necessary. But, now I work for MAC Cosmetics, and we're pretty known for our fantabulous makeup skills and Halloween is a huge deal for all of the artists. 


So we had some crazy makeup adventures and it was really encouraging to see all of the artists complementing each other and random people coming up and just staring at our makeup creations! I've always wanted to work for MAC so it was a huge wave of pride that went through me. 

i make a mean snooki

Also, on a more personal note. I'm not fucking up in my personal life. I'm not screwing it up like I usually do and I'm receiving some encouragement and compliments regarding the situation. Yay Delaney! 

i think we're losing our sense of humor instead of being able to relax and laugh at ourselves. i don't care whether it's ethnicity, age, sexual orientation, or whose ox is being gored.

The baddest old lady around said this quote. Betty White, everybody. I hope I'm remotely as cool as that woman at that age. Maybe like 1/8 as rich. That'd be nice too.


"I think we're losing our sense of humor instead of being able to relax and laugh at ourselves. I don't care whether it's ethnicity, age, sexual orientation, or whose ox is being gored."


She's old, funny, adorable AND smart! I'd totally date her if I were an incredibly old man. Or if I dated old ladies? Anyway... I looked up quotes about relaxation because I just took a nap. I love naps. I don't know who the inventor of the first nap was, but I love that person. What a fantastic idea to sleep for an hour or 5 when it's not necessarily "bedtime." How rebellious. 


So, I saw this quote and it wasn't exactly the point of my search, but it's great and it's by Betty White and she needed to be represented immediately in this high-profile (just let me say it, self-esteem booster) blog.

me & peyton giggle. look how cute we are.

I think it's true though. I feel like the world around us, around me at least, is just... I don't even know the word. I feel like everybody just needs to relax. Just not think that every negative thing someone says or dumb tweet is about you. Maybe it is, maybe you have some reason to be paranoid (that's the word I was lookin for!) but for the most part, everyone just needs to calm down. 


Everyone's always getting so defensive and causing issues for no reason and I can't say that I'm completely innocent of all this, my hands are not always clean. I have issues. We've discussed this previously. I'd just like to prescribe everyone around me a giant chill pill. If those existed, which they probably do... just not legally, I'd be a happy camper. So stop being anal, paranoid, tightly-wound human beings. 


Laugh more. Ten bucks says you're cuter when you do!

sooner or later, we all quote our mothers.

Easily one of the truest (Is that a word? It's not being underlined in red, so I'm just going to assume it is.) things I've read in a long time. As much as I sometimes don't like to admit it, I am slowly but surely turning into my mama with every word I speak. I use her old-school yiddish sayings in every day conversation (confusing those around me) and use her classic expressions such as "a wee bit cuntish"- pronounced 'coon-tish' (which i never realized the meaning of until I actually wrote it out a few years back and had a Ooooooooh!" moment). Tsk, tsk who would've known my mama had such a potty mouth!?

I really don't have too much to say on this topic. I randomly found this quote so I figured I'd post it for the hell of it. I love my mama and I'd like to love like her, care like her, be as funny as her, as smart as her just be a little less worry-some. But for the most part- I wouldn't mind stealing all of her attributes. She's a cool broad. And she aged well. Fingers crossed!

i'm lazy. but it's the lazy people who invented the wheel and the bicycle because they didn't like walking or carrying things.

sad laney :(

This is about to be real short. But studying for my Geography test is so fucking boring I figured I'd post a random quote. Laziness seemed like a solid topic to start as the theme for the my day. I'm also sick, so I can use that as an excuse.

"I'm lazy. But it's the lazy people who invented the wheel and the bicycle because they didn't like walking or carrying things."

(Good ol' Lech Walesa came up with that one. He's a Polish politician and human-rights activist, if you care.)

Gameplan is to be as lazy as possible so I can invent something that other lazy people can enjoy. Have they invented a machine that sucks snot out of noses? How about unplugs ears that've been plugged for 4 days straight? I'd like to have both of those things at my bedside right now. I'm strugglin' over here.

Alright, fine. Back to Geography. And constantly yawning to get my ears to unpop. And my box of Puffs (because my nose is indeed, in need). I'm just going to fail anyway. Blah.

there are thousands of causes for stress, and one antidote to stress is self-expression. that's what happens to me every day. my thoughts get off my chest, down my sleeves and onto my pad.

Seeing as I'm a full-time student, part-time employee and full-time girl... I'm always stressed. Alright, maybe not always but probably a solid 73% of the time. Which is .73 which rounds up to .1, AKA 100%. So technically, mathematically speaking, I'm always stressed.

But ah! I've come up with a recent revelation. Blogging relieves some stress. Writing down shit about how I feel about some quote actually serves some purpose other than procrastinating studying or doing something other than going on twitter (...follow me @ddddelaney-- nice plug, right?). So I figured today I'd find a quote about stress. And I stumbled upon this gem by Garson Kanin, an old Hollywood actor and director.

"There are thousands of causes for stress, and one antidote to stress is self-expression. That's what happens to me every day. My thoughts get off my chest, down my sleeves and onto my pad."

I used to go to therapy, which was amazing. I loved therapy, but that shit is expensive! I tried writing songs once (third grade, imagine how deep those badboys were), which I guess is some sort of self-expression...but to be frank, they were wack and I did it for reasons other than to solve deep-seeded issues in my soul. But this blogging thing kind of does it for me. The idea is to do a quote of the day therefore one post per day; but lately the stress levels are up, hormones are a-ragin', and a lot of changes are going on in my life, which makes me want to blog more.

Kanin's quote rings true to me. I like the idea of thoughs getting off my chest, down my arms and onto this blog. It really is an every day thing. Sure, some days the stress buildup is stronger than others but overall, I feel mentally exhausted on a regular basis. So thanks, blogger.com for letting me let out some emotional baggage onto your site without filtering or censoring me. It's much appreciated :)

we are prepared for insults, but compliments leave us baffled.

Alright, today's quote is from Mason Cooley. Wikipedia describes him as "an American aphorist known for his witty aphorisms," which is no help to me due to the fact that I don't know what an aphorist or aphorism is. So I had to look up that word too and an aphorism is a "statement of general principle condensing much wisdom into a few words." You're welcome for the lesson. I encourage you to use these words in everyday conversation from this point on.

"We are prepared for insults, but compliments leave us baffled."

I agree 100%. I have issues. Let's just put that out there. I can't take a compliment to save my life. I get confused if someone calls me funny and god forbid someone calls me pretty, you might as well just give up there. I don't know why I'm more comfortable receiving a terribly insulting remark, but I just do. Maybe it's the consistent pessimist viewpoint on life that does it.

Then again, I always think people are joking. So when a dude calls me a bitch, I'm like, "Eh, you're a douchebag" and I move on in life. If he were to compliment me, I react as if they just told me I have a disease. It's just not something I'm comfortable with. Any ideas as to why? My parents hugged me as a child. I was raised in a good family. Yeah, we were sarcastic a solid 87% of the time, but it's not like my mom called me a fat cow and my dad told me I was a waste of space and I was just used to it.

Moral of the story is that Delaney needs to learn how to take a compliment; because I cannot go through life just accepting insults and turning down compliments. That's how you get in abusive relationships. And bruises and cuts aren't cute. I can't pull it off like Rihanna did. (Was that inappropriate?... sorry!)



10/28/10- UPDATE:
I'm feelin' under the weather so I visited the university clinic today & the man at the desk told me that my (hideous) ID picture was good. I told him he was nuts and he looked at me and said "you're supposed to say thank you." A) I found that a little rude, but I guess I was too when I told him he was nuts for thinking that. B) I really can't take a compliment. I suck.

from small beginnings come great things.

A famous American Proverb (so famous that nobody knows his/her name) once said "From small beginnings come great things."

I think this is a good quote to start with considering its about beginnings, and hey, this is the beginning of the blog, so why not start with something blatantly obvious? The general idea for this blog is for me to find some random quote and give my two cents about it. Maybe include a little life story you can relate to. Or read and say "Jeez, she really is a moron. What was she thinking?" then provide me with therapy via internet therefore, no charge :)

Moving on...

I'd have to generally agree with this quote. Sometimes it's the itty bitty things you never think will make a difference, that make the largest impact on your life. I really didn't think coming to Kentucky for college from the Northwest suburbs of Chicago would be that big of a deal. Boy oh boy was I wrong! Deciding to go South rather than North, East or West was genuinely life changing. I went to college knowing a handful of people. I didn't realize how different I was. A jewish democrat? They really exist? It was like I was an alien. I was asked strange (and occasionally, very rude) questions on a regular basis.

But from being able to branch out and not go to Illinois, Indiana or Iowa, I got to grow more than the average kid from where I grew up. I was surrounded by people who knew nothing about my culture and stared at me like I was growing a tail when I said a sarcastic comment. I've lost some friends along the way, but I've gained a lot from moving here.

Will I stay in Lexington? Hellllll, no. But I can't say great things didn't come from my small decision to attend the University of Kentucky.